This blogpost was inspired by a call for guidance wall post, of a fellow adult daughter, healing from Narcissistic abuse of a Narcissistic mother, in a private social media support group. The following is inspired by my response to her.
They are usually more jaded, wounded, even paranoid and distrusting of others. They can’t see you as separate, more of an appendage. They can’t have a 2 way, balanced, concerned conversation, and instead gain fuel through any engagement, drama, defense, etc with you. They will offload and dump their toxic poisons into, and on you. Keeping themselves in the superior position and you, and others in the inferior one, is a constant need and strategy. They lie and use manipulative tactics to avoid responsibility for the manipulative ways they treat you and others.
And as you get healthy and start to set and maintain boundaries, and see and call them on their manipulative behaviors and Narcissistic habits, this triggers their Narcissistic wounding, as in it highlights the wounded real self they hide from people, and hide from themselves. So as you get healthier, they lose some of their mask, strategic power, control and dominance. This is both highly dangerous and a form of death to them. They will project all their pain, vulnerability and weakness onto you. If you back off to claim healthy whole living, balance and clarity, they will be forced to push other flying monkeys into their sphere, who believe their false dramas and give them fuel without question, hassles, or truth.
I just listened to a few wonderful powerful new support videos on Youtube (see links below.) The presenters reminded of a few key points. One is that Narcissists have the equivalent of brain damage, and as they age, it is highly unlikely that it will ever heal, go away, and or change.
Two, they are insecure, and thus need to diminish and cut down other people to raise themselves up.
Three, the insecure narcissist can trigger your insecurities, so the best response you can bring, is remaining as secure and strong within yourself and life, as possible, both for yourself, and in interactions with them.
And four, if and when the Narcissist goes to therapy, they do not go as healthy individuals, rather they go to learn all the ways that did not work of manipulating their Narcissistic Supply Providers, and to strategize new ways to manipulate the people in their immediate life. Thus, even therapy can make them sicker and more dangerous.
Therapy isn't for everyone, only for the emotionally responsible. I guess our job is to become so strong and love filled, that we develop a natural immunity to the toxic shame they steep in and project out, through bouts of volatility, projection, rage, and childish tantrums! Our assignment also includes creating wonderful lives for ourself, and getting our focus off them.
Here are three new YouTube videos that I find beautifully helpful, as discovered today.
How the Insecure Narcissist Can Trigger your Insecurities - Dr. Les Carter - Surviving Narcissism
Imaginary Confessions of a Narcissist (If only they could be this honest) - Dr. Les Carter - Surviving Narcissism
Light Language Healing for Full Chakra Cleanse with Marlene Cronin
Here are some additional resources for anyone open to, or needing to learn more about Narcissistic Abuse Recovery. I have gathered the following support YouTube Videos on this topic, weeding out some of the most super supportive, highly informative, and less well known insights and guidance videos on a YouTube Playlist I call "Top Resources for Understanding Narcissists."
"Top Resources for Understanding Narcissists."
The second list I am sharing is a far more comprehensive list. Here it is:
"Resources for Understanding and Recovery from Narcissists... (and Narcissistic Abuse)"
If you are interested in the New Earth based toolkits I offer on this path of Soul Expansion, Please visit my website at:
where you can learn more about ThetaHealing, Quantum Healing Hypnosis Technique, and Parallel Life Regression.
Stay tuned for more new offerings, in the making right now!
I welcome you to share this blog entry, and these resources freely.
We have been trained to love our family, parents and partners unconditionally. I recommend and encourage new terminology, which is to love and relate with wholehearted discernment. Many of these unhealthy patterns grew out of times when emotional I.Q. was really, overall not considered, studied, honored, nor understood.
You are living in new times, when teachers like Brené Brown, Kathlyn and Gay Hendricks, Vianna Stibal, The Pleiadians through Nora Herold, Dolores Cannon, Dr. Eric Pearl, Dr. Les Carter, Lisa A. Romano, and you and I, Jen Klarfeld exist, and are helping turn the whole game around for good!
Let us celebrate, be vulnerable, honor imperfections, and honor our divinity by being whole, gentle, loving, unifying, Graced and grateful within this grand Creation.
Cocreative Kin: Be blessed!