|Collaborative Multi Media Painting by Kamajou Tadfor & Jen Klarfeld|
Please excuse me for weaning off my beautiful hand collaged journals, a whole month ago today, in trade for blogging on my new blog, here. Tonight I sat down, and picked up my current, bold, art covered journal, collaged in images of bold orange-yellow coral, an orange, expressionistic Jamie Chase painted female figure, a beaded native bag, transformed to a pillow, behind the figure, an older Native Woman, kissing her Man, donning a bold, ceremonial, red, orange, yellow, black and white, headdress, ribbon shirt, beadwork and all, a beautiful modern Kachina painting by Gregory Lomayesva, and one painted cubist woman in candy colored turquoise green, sky blue, orange-yellow, sky blue, scarlet red, and pale yellow! Funny as it celebrates my deep love of art, creativity, painting and colors, while I presently find myself, less focused on painting, and more focused on the soul arts!
Still life opens opportunities for me to continue juggling my two highest passions, soul transformation, and process painting, from soul to canvas!
Now I experiment here, crossing the journal and blog, like a genetic writing experiment. May it all be for good. Here goes:
I DO FEEL A MASSIVE SHIFT FROM:
- old paradigm to new
- struggling to thriving
- karma to grace
- separation to oneness
- suffering to elation
- fighting against to attracting & surrender
- hiding to revealing
- secrets to openess
- greed & need to sharing & service
- trauma to transformation
- warring to bliss
- feeling lost to sharing understanding
- isolation to unity
- brokenness to wholeness
- disease to healing
- busy-ness to being
- mechanistic to natural
- mutant to real
- lost to multiversal
- density to light
- slavery to freedom
- hurt to well
- following to leading
- cluelessness to knowing
- stuck to growing
- feeling small to divine
- abandonment to connection
- local to cosmic
- hateful to loving
- judging to accepting
A local facebook, artist friend, expressed "concern," for why exactly I am dabbling in inner demons? He said he helps people clear demons and that the subject is not light. I said, I too help people transform their inner demons, yet I know it can indeed be light, when we open to a larger context.
"What is my primary inner demon?" I wondered, as I forged inward to explore.
At first I saw a male figure, a hurt man. Then I saw a more expansive indigo, crystal, and violet energy, kind of contracted, very deflated, an energy living like a sponge, or a filter, soaking up so much of the dense, Earthy human rays of hurt, suffering, and sadness. This energy seemed to learn, from lineages of mothers, how to feel, see, mirror, attract, soak up, and run the energy of pain. This energy learned to collapse inward and soak up other people's pain. On Earth, it learned to absorb and reflect the ways of humans. It learned to stifle its true nature, which is to radiate divine light, from the inside, out. It learned to withhold this light, this crystal clarity, this cosmic unity, and instead how to suck in and grow dense and clogged with pain, from hurt human beings, taking this pain in, and on, as if its own!
So in talking to me, and me talking to this energy, my inner demon slowly and surely, morphed into my INNER DIVINITY, transforming from "clogged, dense, heavy, suck up," back to indigo, crystal, violet, lavender radiance, feeling colorful, cosmic, and freeing, purposeful, satisfying and true!
The inner demon is really my vast and infinite high vibrational divinity, coming back out to play.
I feel a little too energetically ambushed to leap in and paint this right away.
I saw beautiful energies, colors, and dancing divinity, expanding and unfolding beyond the masks of demon territories. It may be difficult to paint, express and defend. Perhaps I will include some of the human masks it has learned, in past, to hide behind.
Within is our VAST DIVINITY. In a conditioned, warring world, it learns to collapse itself, to hide, and soak up outward pain. The TRUTH is far more VAST!
Seeing this, as revealed by some of my clients, reminds that a very popular game on Earth, is that of fear, shutting down, and loading up with yucky feelings, thoughts, and vibes.
My inner demon grew up, out of a drive for self protection. Vast power lives beyond the small hiding poses! I am living and revealing this freely now! I am grateful to share in the massive wave of humanity, awakening and sharing this now!